After your marriage has ended, you will likely be ready to move on and begin again, and this may mean starting a new romantic relationship. However, you may not want to rush into introducing a new partner to your family after your divorce. Depending on your situation, your children might not have an easy time adjusting to this new person being in their lives. Before you make the decision to introduce your new partner to your family, consider the following:
Factors That Determine How Your Children Will React to a New Partner
Before you discuss your new relationship with your kids, you may want to think about the following so that you know what to expect:
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The Ages of Your Children—Depending on a child’s age, he/she may react differently to a new partner. For instance, young children could connect with a new partner a lot easier than a teenager could, because the teenager might be fully aware of the difficulties that resulted in the divorce in the first place, leading them to harbor resentment and hold a preemptive grudge against the new partner. However, young children may also quickly become attached to the new partner, and if the relationship ends prematurely, they may be heartbroken.
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The Personalities of Your Children—All children are different. Their personalities often dictate how they will react to a new relationship. For example, if your child is particularly sensitive, a new partner might disturb them greatly, especially if you have not been divorced for very long. You might want to give your kids some time to adjust before introducing any additional changes to their lives.
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The Status of the Divorce—If your ex-spouse is not highly involved in your children’s lives due to the decisions made about child custody in your divorce, you may want to speak with your new partner whether he/she is interested in taking on a parental role with you. If your new partner is not interested in this role, then you may want to consider keeping your family life and romantic life separate to avoid burdening your new partner with unrealistic expectations.
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The Seriousness of Your New Relationship—You need to know for sure that the partner you are introducing to your children is one whom you intend to have a long-term, serious relationship with. Yet again, you want to minimize changes in your child’s life. If the new relationship ends shortly after you introduce your partner to the family, your children could feel betrayed or otherwise confused and uncertain as a result of the changes. You will want to maintain stability in your child’s life to ensure that they can move forward following your divorce.
Contact a DuPage County Divorce Lawyer
Introducing your new partner to your family does not have to create conflict. If you are thoughtful about the timing and the ways that you introduce them to your children, you will be able to minimize the possibility of negative reactions and ensure that everyone can coexist happily. If you have questions about the legal issues that need to be addressed during or after your divorce, call a Wheaton, IL family law attorney at 630-871-1002. The team at Andrew Cores Family Law Group will give you a free consultation to help you face any legal challenges that may arise.
Sources:
https://www.familyeducation.com/life/dating-after-divorce/involving-your-children-your-new-relationship
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jul/28/how-to-introduce-your-children-to-a-new-partner
https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/introducing-children-to-new-partner_uk_5e4e616ac5b6a7bfb4c15c5d
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